Being a "Warm Demander"

I am in the process of reading Lisa Delpit's "Multiplication is for White People: Raising Expectations for Other People's Children" and was struck by the notion of what she calls a "warm demander".  Warm demanders are teachers who push their students, who demand that they perform and who insist that each individual is capable of doing whatever anyone else can do. This is especially important with students who have been told repeatedly that they are not good enough or smart enough.

I have seen this type of deficit thinking in schools before. A student who falls behind or that simply needs more time is considered "slow".  Students who come from low income families are already labelled as "at-risk". Students who have different skin color than their peers are looked at as if they are behind already, and if one or two show the same intelligence as the rest, then they are considered the exception. It had always frustrated me that we seemed to be encouraging these students to do as little as possible. Instead of offering up the same challenges that we demand of others, we convince ourselves, and them, that they are simply not smart enough to do it on their own. When we expect so little, we are likely to get little in return. Then, we continue this type of "hand-holding" throughout grade school, and sometimes through middle school, and wonder why they are still not capable of doing anything on their own come high school.

But it is not enough to simply demand more of these students. Yes, we need to raise our expectations and yes, we need to push them to achieve more than they thought they could, but we also need to show care and concern for each and every one of them. Delpit writes that, "When students believe that teachers believe in their ability, when they see teachers willing to go the extra mile to meet their academic deficiencies, they are much more likely to try." Our students need to see that we push so hard because we know that they can do it. Whether they come from a background of poverty, whether they have never been expected to do well before, whether things at home are a mess, we still believe that they can excel as a student. We need to not only demand excellence, but we need to give them the tools and the necessary support so that they can meet those demands.

I would love nothing more than for my students to see me as a warm demander. It is definately not the passive approach to teaching, and I know that it will sometimes be overwhelming, but isn't this why a person should go into teaching? Why else would anyone be crazy enough to take charge of a classroom of 25+ children? It is certainly not for the money or the prestige of the job. To me, though, nothing is more gratifying than seeing my students engaged and challenged by the work that is in front of them.